"The Year" has begun today. We took Rhett to the airport last night and held him tight - pressing our faces against his face, and feeling his skin. What do you do when the love of your life and joy of your days goes away? You cry, you smile, you know that they have your heart in their hands, and that they will return to you again - your love stronger. My heart is full and feels squeezed and twisted this morning! As sat in the car and watched for a while as he walked into the busy terminal and soon we could just see the back of his head far away as he walked. It was good to sit and have a good cry - Garrett, Cecily, and I. Madison had a ton of homework at home, and Cecily and Livi were at the Smiths - having fun playing. I was in kind of a daze on the way home, and I took the wrong turn and got stuck on Highway 66 going East in heavy traffic. Eventually we found our way to 495 and the beltway and made our way home. As I was thinking about Rhett and I turned on the radio station, I couldn't believe it! The first song that came on was "Something Happens and I'm Head over Heels", a song that was one of "our" songs when we were dating. I felt chills up and down my spine, and all those amazing dating memories came flooding back - the snow in Boulder, Colorado. Floating home in a cloud back and forth on the Diagonal after a date with Rhett, or seeing him again. Though we married young, I don't regret one minute of it - not one!
I'm trying to write down all the things Rhett used to do that I am now going to do - I won't bore you with all of them, but when I came home, Garrett and I took the trash and the recycling in, I locked the doors and activated the alarm system, wrote a note to remind myself to set the clocks back, set the alarm, and woke up the older kids this morning at 5:15 - all things that Rhett does and has always done, as a kindness to me. This morning when I logged in, a message came on that said "Please remember to change the air filters". Rhett put all these reminders in the computer so I can remember them. I am also going to try and remember and write down all the "tender mercies" and ways that God shows his hand in our daily lives. I know that he is with us! Last night- the thing that got me is turning down the covers and seeing Rhett's pillow that he left, and the indentation in the sheets made by his sleeping body! I touched the indentation and felt it, imaginating that it was him and what he would feel like. I guess I will know now a little more how people feel who sleep alone, and have a little more empathy for the lonely. Becca remedied that by getting up in the middle of the night and crawling into Rhett's side of the bed. I know this blog is kind-of personal today, but it is really good to write and let the tears come. Don't worry about us! We are going to be just fine. I also know that Rhett will be fine too, and that we will grow together as a family. We love you all!
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6 comments:
Thanks for sharing that blog Melecia. Kendi and I are praying for you guys. That's neat that you have so many happy memories together and I'm sure those memories will keep you close while you're apart.
When I'm away from Kendi and/or the kids for an extended period of time, I get some similar feelings. I'll pace the house looking at photos, smell the pillows or try to picture them in my mind - happy memories. You and Rhett are lucky to have each other.
Thats good to write down your feelings. I'm sure Rhett will appreciate reading that. Technology can be a life saver sometimes. Its so much better than waiting two weeks for a letter to come. Let us know if he starts a blog.
That was a touching and beautifully written blog, Melecia. My heart goes out to you and your family. It was wonderful having such a personal and meaningful conversation yesterday with Rhett by phone just before he left. This will be another time in your life that you will treasure, although very difficult. He told me there will likely be at least three times within the next year when you will have some time together. I believe the time will go quickly as you focus on your present tasks.
Absence truly makes the heart grow fonder. I've experienced that often when Susan travels without me. There's always a child or pet that will jump into bed with you while your lover is gone.
We look forward to keeping in closer touch while Rhett is gone. We love you so much. Dad
Thank you for giving of yourself this morning, my lovely daughter. I cried as I read your words - -you have a way of writing that brings me in beside you, so that I almost experience it with you.
My heart is with you. You are blessed to have each other, and we'll pray that the time flies for you both.
Cute Becca and the other kids will help more than you know. She climbed in with me a few times when I was there.
I love that you will be helped by our Heavenly Father through the whole thing. Remember that, and lean on the Savior and your love. Love you so much.
Mom
Melecia:
You are a truly beautiful soul! I love you so much and want you to know that you are an inspiration and example to me. I wish I was there to hold your hand, but like you said, I know you are going to be just fine and Rhett too and the kids too! The Lord will surely take care of things!!
Thanks for sharing your feelings and memories. Technology is really a blessing when used to bring people together and to share lovely thoughts and loving feelings.
Again, I love you so much! Hugs to you all,
Susan
Way to go on the playlist!! Now you need to teach me how to put one on my blog!!?? Please!!
Susan
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